For years, I played nice. I sat back and got told I was “the problem” while my boys got sicker and sicker. I nodded along in doctor’s offices, accepted vague reassurances, and convinced myself that maybe I was overreacting. Maybe the exhaustion, and being a new mother were just stress. Maybe I just needed to “stop being anxious” or “get more sleep.”

But no matter how many prescriptions we got “shushed” with or how much I tried to tell myself this was normal, they still got sick, and I still felt awful. And every time I tried to advocate for myself or my boys, I was met with the same dismissive response:

• “Their labs are normal.”
• “You’re just anxious.”
• “There’s nothing wrong.”

I wasn’t being heard. I was being gaslit.

 

What Medical Gaslighting Looks Like

Medical gaslighting happens when doctors dismiss or downplay your symptoms, making you feel like you’re imagining things. It’s common, especially for women, because the system isn’t built to listen to us—it’s built to keep us quiet.

And the worst part? It works.

You start questioning yourself. You wonder if maybe you are just overreacting. You tell yourself that if the tests come back normal, then maybe you just have to live with feeling this way.

But just because something isn’t showing up on a standard lab test doesn’t mean it isn’t real.

 

How I Stopped Playing Nice and Started Getting Answers

I decided I wasn’t going to settle for “everything looks fine” anymore. Here’s what changed:

1. I Stopped Accepting “Normal” as an Answer

When doctors told me my labs were normal, I asked: “Normal for who?” Because normal and optimal are two very different things.

Thyroid markers, blood sugar levels, nutrient levels—all of these have “normal” ranges that don’t actually mean you’re functioning at your best. I pushed for full panels instead of the basic tests, and guess what? The deeper testing revealed clear imbalances that had been ignored for years.

2. I Tracked My Symptoms Like a Scientist

Doctors couldn’t ignore hard data, so I started collecting my own:

✔️ Energy levels throughout the day

✔️ Sleep patterns

✔️ Mood changes

✔️ Digestive symptoms

When I showed up to appointments with patterns and trends instead of just saying “I feel off,” the conversation changed. I was no longer the “emotional” patient—I was someone with clear evidence that something was wrong.

3. I Found a Doctor Who Actually Listened

Not all healthcare providers dismiss symptoms—but the right one won’t make you fight to be believed. I stopped wasting energy on doctors who weren’t interested in digging deeper and found a practitioner who actually looked beyond the surface.

If your doctor is brushing you off, they are not the right doctor for you.

Need a fresh perspective? Let’s find the root cause of your symptoms. Book a consult today.

4. I Learned How to Advocate for Myself

Speaking up in a medical setting can feel intimidating. But your health is not a debate—it’s a priority.

Instead of passively accepting what I was told, I started asking questions:

• “What else could be causing this?”
• “Can we run additional tests?”
• “Can you explain why you don’t think this is a concern?”

And if the answers weren’t good enough, I moved on. No more playing nice.

 

You Deserve to Be Heard

If you’ve ever walked out of an appointment feeling ignored, I see you. It’s frustrating. It’s exhausting. And it’s not okay.

Your symptoms are not in your head. Your intuition is not wrong. Your body is trying to tell you something, and you deserve a practitioner who listens.

Tired of being dismissed? Let’s get to the bottom of it. Book a consult today.